This time I decided to take an Italian approach to my problems haha. Okay but seriously there actually is a few problems that I am facing with writing this Common Place paper. The main one I feel is expressing my arguments in a way that is acceptable for Common Place. I feel like I have really good arguments, but I'm not using enough appeal to pathos, logos, and ethos to deliver these statements. I feel like I'm just delivering common sense facts. Here's an example of what I'm talking about...
"The reality of the situation is that the talent level of the majority of the world has been closing in on the elites and the best are more subject to falling no more than ever it seems."
I feel like this sentence needs to be here to establish my point that there isn't that much separation between the best and the middle of the pack. I also feel like it's boring is more of just an opinion by the author. Let me know what you think!
I feel as though the sentence should be worded more clearly. I'm struggling to understand what it's talking about. The reality is kind of seems like a general term as well
ReplyDeleteI would maybe say something about the middle of the pack. In this sentence it makes it sound more like the everyone is catching up on the elite. And trust me I'm not closing in on LeBron James anytime soon.
ReplyDeleteI don't know if it's the talent level gap closing at all. I think our superstars, though, feel a shit load of more pressure than the great athletes of the past. That pressure seems to be driving our stars to do whatever it takes to be as good as they can and continually improve, even if they don't do it the honest way. Steroids in baseball says it all...
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